Untitled, plate 4 of 17, from the illustrated book, Hang On; The Climb
2004-2006
States
Illustrated Book
2004
Louise Bourgeois,
Hang On,
New York, Osiris, 2004Bourgeois's entire text for this volume appears on the pages cited below.
Page 1:
I want to say
I want to tell
I want to see
I want to learn
I want to know
Page 2:
I want to control
I want to hold
I want to feel
I want to remember
Page 3:
I want to go
I want to want
I want to find
I want to finish
I want to forget
Page 4:
I want to be good
I want to be better
I want to do it
I want to show
I want to outdo
I want to top it
I want to accomplish mastery
Page 5:
I want the means to get
I want the tools
I want omnipotence
I want to manipulate
I want to be an acrobat
Page 6:
I want to be healthy
I want to be strong
I want to be clever
I want to please
I want to be good
Page 7:
I want it now
I want it this minute
I want to make it appear
as a fairy with a magic wand
I say there and there it is
Page 8:
I want to go everywhere
I want to turn around the table
I want to turn around people
I want to turn people around
To understand them
To anticipate them
To fool them
Page 9:
I want them to like
me and tell me
that I am ok
I want to be noticed
I want to be given
I want to be loved
Page 10:
I want to be right
I want to prove
I want to survive
I want to be free
I want to please
Page 11:
I want to avoid
death, destruction, guilt
Page 12:
I want to escape
I have to escape
I do not want to look
I have to find a diversion
a substitute
Page 13:
I want to look
around and see
then I want to go
back to my lair
and close my door
and then I want to get out
again and look at
everything
Page 14:
But I know that
I cannot see
I cannot learn
I can never know
I am not supposed to go
It is bad to want
I never find
I will not finish
I cannot forget
Page 15:
I cannot control
I cannot hold
I may not feel
I am unable to remember
Page 16:
The voice of reason and experience
The real world always says no
To be rich is not to want beyond my means
To be satisfied – to be wise
To be satisfied with what I have
Page 17:
Contemplate a finished and concentric world like a rose